Post by penelope elena fischer on Jul 30, 2013 2:38:25 GMT -8
| [atrb=style,width: 420px; background-color: efefef; background-image: url(http://24.media.tumblr.com/0478144b9f16c95a37367d1aca56b45c/tumblr_mkfax8tDxp1s97ldco1_500.png); padding: 5px, bTable] PENELOPE E. FISCHER TWENTY FIVE | HETEROSEXUAL | CURATOR | LOCAL | JENNA LOUISE COLEMAN Do you know why you are here?” ”is this another trick question?” ”when did we ask you a trick question?” ”twenty nine minutes ago when you asked if i could be hypnotized…” ”we believe you can, it’s recommended that we try it.” ”my boss suggested this cause of my recent loss…” ”that’s why you are back, correct? new york city to a small town must be hard.” ”they left me my childhood house, how could i not return? with grett and my friends…i’m set..” ”glad you are settling in w-…” ”said i was good, doesn’t mean it’s easy..” ”okay mrs. fischer..watch the dial.’ "that's a watch..." her eyes soon followed the dial as it moved back and forth, her eyes darting left and then right, left and right, right and left, he changed the direction and she continued to follow it. with a snap of his fingers, penny’s head fell forward and she was put under a controlling state, something that only the doctor could break and they had only just begun. ”okay penelope.” spoke a voice in the distance, so far that she could not even pinpoint it, but her head was still down and she was forced to go into her deep unconscious. ”describe your first memory with your mother.”. the girl picked her head up and nodded, seeing it in her mind and speaking of the surrounding—a hospital—and the people there—her mother and father. she described the clothes that they were wearing in great detail but finally she shook her head, trying to break out of this memory as it was the only good one that she had of her mother and penny did not want to think of her mother in this light. they were gone, what more could she do? ”talk to me penny.”, and she nodded, ”the room was white. really white, paler than my own complexion..”, self-degraded in a comical tone, a habit that she could never lose, ”my mother, my eyes…i am told that i have her eyes a lot. everyone at the funeral told me so..”, but then she was forced to focus back on the memory, the one that she was forced headfirst into once more, ”it was her third time there since i was born. she got into an accident when pregnant with me…a car thing, a collision of sorts..”, biggest reason that she did not drive herself, ”hit her head and it caused issues. not with me but with her, something with her head.”, she repeated the same thing twice. in her mind, she was staring at the younger version of herself, distant from her mother and father who were holding hands. her father had brought a chair up, two in case penny joined them but she stayed by the door, three years old, and just stared. ”what did they say to you?”, he urged her own, not catching the signs of distress on the young woman’s face, ”they kept telling me to come. to come see mommy, to hug mommy…”, her breath catching in her throat as her voice cracked, ”when didn’t you?”, he asked her, writing something down which penny took no notice of, usually would have and would have commented on it too but her unconscious had a steady hold of her, ”she didn’t look like her. she didn’t look like my mommy..”. ”okay penny, let’s move on. leave that memory.”, a snap of the fingers ringed in her ears and she was sucked back into reality. her eyes were wet though, it was the first thing that she noticed and quickly reached up to wipe them, ”you made me cry..”, looking to the doctor who actually had a small look of guilt upon his face, ”yes. it was for your own good though, we are making progress. shall we try another?’. cautious to nod, she just stared at the doctor who was awaiting her approval and after a few moments, she gave a small nod and her head dropped to the sound of the finger snap, sucked back into her own mind again. ”okay let’s try a memory with your father. one without your mother. how old are you? where are you?”, and she nodded, obliging as her mind pulled her back in time to when she was six and sitting on her father’s knee. ”a basement of some sorts. had a boy haircut at this point cause i sneezed when the lady was cutting my hair…”, shaking her head as she was forced to witness the card game, ”think he was on an assignment. my dad was a cop, a damned good one..”. but penny was not entirely sure why she was brought to the game when men surroundings them had weapons attached to their hip. she was six. she was supposed to be in bed now, looking to the clock, she read it was almost midnight. why was she was still up? then the girl recognized it as her own basement and she was not surrounded by criminals but fellow cops. her dad fanned the cards out for her to see and penny picked them, choosing three to toss away. for some reason, her father listened to her child-like judgement and tossed those cards away, gaining three new ones. ”did your dad win?”, and penny nodded, smiling as she watched her small self be tossed into the air, ”of course he did. i was his good luck charm…”, her voice trailing off as she sat down on the steps and just watched herself be showered with love and affection. the kisses to her cheeks were soft but the giggles were loud until a sudden scream cut everything off, ”who screamed?’, and penny gave a small sigh, ”my mother..”. ”how old are you this time?’, letting the patient pick her own dream. her mother was sitting at the table, staring at the candles on the cake that read the number ten. she was turning ten years old in this memory. the remains of a family could be seen, small group of adults but more children as it showed her more social butterfly ways as a young child. she was friendly to everyone and because of that, she had a lot of friends. no one was really aware of her mother’s head injury, ”why not?”, spoke a voice and penny was obligated to answer under the trance, ”cause i asked daddy if it was okay to tell my friends…and he said to keep it between us.”, and so she did. the girl was always a good secret keeper after all. ”that cake was the best. i was a bit of a tomboy so it had cars but the cars had flowers and it was a petal race track, think my dad tried to make the track cause it was all weird…my mom just stared at the cake. i think she wanted to make it for me, but she couldn’t. not with her head..”, the loud noise began to erupt as the singing began, her mother’s eyes growing wide and then her presence disappearing which her father and herself did not question. the singing continued and then she was able to blow out her candles, ”what did you wish for? a ten year old girl wanted what exactly…”, and penny’s brows furrowed, ”nothing. i wished for nothing.”, which was true. penny had not thought of her life as being unfortunate, her mother was the way that she was, her father was the best thing that happened and she did not need anything more, ”but i got a puppy on that day.”. ”do you like animals?” asked the doctor, and he got a nod in response, ”what kind of person does not like animals?...now doctors…that is something that i am not a fan of.”, speaking on purpose about her distaste for what was happening. she was relieving her best and worst memories all in the name of a diagnosis. she had been tested many times for insanity, just a precaution for her mother but nothing came up, if there was anything, it was flying under the radar. being under the microscope was not the problem, it was being used that was bugging her. ”so describe your childhood dog..”, and penny nodded, ”more like my year old dog who ended up being hit by a milk truck…”, but then a pause and a sigh was had, ”though that did not kill her.’, giving a light smile to the thought of the chocolate lab. they had adventures but those times were cut short, ”she survived the truck, she survived the hit to the head with a baseball by the neighbors, she did not survive my mother’s eye..”. there was fear in her voice when she spoke of her mother now, something that was not present in the past when she was smaller and her mother was unable to do anything, ”she got worse..”, her mother not the dog, ”and she believed jewel was stopping me from being social so, when i was eleven and a half…”. the doctor giving her a look to her impressive memory, testing it further, ”what day?”, and penny instantly responded, ”june 5th.”, she replied before looking over to him, ”was the day that my mother gave my dog away while i was at school.”. though she seemed to be over the ordeal, it still affected her, making her a little more attached to people incase they were pushed out of her life. most people pushed people away with matters such as this, but she held on, ”it was the same day that she died six years later.” which would have made her seventeen and a half. ”let’s not get there. you are a eleven here. what about school life. how was that for you?”, the doctor was writing stuff down, intrigued by the past of this girl and how she could still be optimistic but still cynical at the same time. she knew when bad things were going to happen, when outcomes were not in her favor and yet, she kept a prime eye open for any chance where the light could be seen, where a silver lining could be taken. ”school was okay for me. i was not a genius, and still not but i got decent grades. i was honor roll in middle school and i shot for high honor roll in high school…succeeded too, at least in my last two years.”. she thought back to middle school, it was a blur even under the trance but she remembered the clarinet, the development of hormones and noticing boys, noticing things changing in herself and about her physical appearance. by the time she reached high school, penny was not the gawky preteen that she had once been. she had grown into her body and developed a bit of a mouth on her, ”so you had a bad attitude?”, but she gave her head a shake, ”not really. i was a teenager, i was emotional and hormonal and in my mind, no one understood me. my dad was always working and my mother was not…there. she didn’t reach me anything, my friends did..”. it was the truth at the end of things. ”how was the love life in high school?”, a question that she could not really answer since it was practically non-existent for her except for a couple of months in sophomore year, ”said i made high honor roll for three years, correct?”, just being sure that she had her facts right, ”well, a boy in my second year caught my attention. cole firman. ridiculous name..”, though hers was not any better, ”but a jock, big, a year older and he and i…well he was my first almost everything. we were too wrapped up in each other but i began to lose myself in a relationship that had no meaning..”, that and she got scared. she got scared about what she was feeling at such a young age, ”so i broke it off…and we were friends under high school ended and then he and i went our separate ways.” and penny had not heard of a whisper about him since and with greyson in her life, it did not even matter anymore. ”well let’s go back to your parents..”, pushing her mind into a specific, forgotten memory and it was for good reason. her life had bene decent, minor mishaps here and there and with her mother’s mental illness, things were hard but penny remembered the first cruel thing that she ever said to her mother. ”can we not..”, she begged, trying to break the trance and pick a new memory, one that did not involve a bad memory but the doctor insisted, giving his fingers another snap and making her fall deeper into the trance. ”so what happened on this night…”, and just like before, she got to see her younger self, standing at the open door and staring out into the rain. ”it was almost two am, my dad had been called out for some kind of emergency and my mom was baking for some reason..”. a trait that she did not pass to her daughter though penny could cook, somewhat, ”she told me to close the door because the oven was not setting right. it made no sense then and makes no sense now, so i continued to wait for him, the door open, looking into the rain.”, her voice was starting to crack but she kept going, witnessing everything but having no power to stop her mother or herself, ”she threw the rolling pin at me. i remember cause it hit my head and she seemed to be so concerned about it, she got me good, a nice cut but nothing happened…”, giving a deep breath, ”but she insisted on cleaning the cut but i didn’t want to leave the door, my dad was gone for almost four hours and in reality, it was my only parent. this was the first time that my mother took an interest in my existence…”. it pained her to admit that but with the memories came the locked away confessions, ”i was yelling at her that i was fine and then i just snapped.”, her eyes filling with tears, lost in the trance and not feeling them sliding down her cheeks, ”what did you tell her?”. penny shook her head, not wanting to admit these horrible words but she caved after a moment quoting it with air quotes, speaking at the same time that she did in the memory, ”’a rolling pin is not going to damage me like that car did to you.’” and then her mother got up and walked away and penny just watched, reaching a hand out for her retreating form. ”did your father come home that night?” and penny quickly nodded, ”of course he did. he always came home to me. he promised everytime that he walked out the door…”, her mind now forcing that memory to come alive. the door was still open, her sleeping form on the porch, curled up in a blanket that her mother laid over her in the middle of the morning. her dad nudged her and she remembered the sight quite vividly, ”what did he tell you?”, which was not the question that penny had been expected. she thought he would ask about the appearance, the shiners, the black eye, the split lip, cut forehead, dried blood that seemed to leak from everywhere, ”he told me to wake up and go inside…he spoke so quickly and so authoritatively that i had to listen. i might have been a teenager but i was not going to say no to my dad..”, she shook her head before watching her form get up and run into the house, her dad following quickly. she rushed to get the first aid kid while he bolted the doors and shut the blinds, closing any access of to the house. penny would later find out why in a fit of revenge against whatever her father had been doing that night, ”we will get to that later..”, as he wanted to know but this story was not yet finished, ”i made him sit on the couch. begged him too since he wanted to check on mom. she was never good at this stuff, so i cleaned him up, stitched up cuts and put ice and applied cream and …nursed him until he gently pushed me out of the way and told me to go to my room, to lock the door and not to come out until he got me.”, and because it was her dad, she agreed, ”something happened in this small town that night. it wasn’t safe for us but my mom refused to leave and my dad would not go without her..”. ”what did your dad do when the door was shut..”, and penny shook her head, ”no idea. there was yelling…and then nothing. it was like the calm before the storm…” ”how many days after…”, he spoke to her, calmly, wiping away the tears rolling down her cheek, ”here, take the tissues, clean yourself up please..”, under the trance, she listened. reaching for the tissue, the girl, in a fit of black in her own mind, reached for the tissue, dapped her eyes and wiped at her nose, ”if you feel tears, wipe them away…”, and she nodded. a new memory, it was just her in the darkness and now she knew why. this was the scariest moment of her life, one that penny could never block out but greyson beside her did wonders to help keep the nightmares at bay. ”we will get to your boyfriend later..”, putting a bit of a bite to her reply, ”fiancé.”, and then she was back to her memory. ”where were you coming from?”, spoke the doctor and penny shrugged, ”my friend’s, she had a bunch of us over. once the alcohol and drugs came out, i left…walked home like an idiot but it was only six blocks…”, she never thought anything could have happened. ”that’s a long way. did you think you would be safe especially with what happened with your dad..”, and penny shrugged, ”safety was not my concern..”, not like it is now, for this exact reason, ”i just wanted to go home, i didn’t know my dad was home and my mom did not …well could not even go near a car, so i walked..”, her voice starting to get a little shaky as she walked along side her younger self. her hair had grown out, she was in shorts and a tanktop, she was sixteen years old and suddenly a scream was heard. it was not from her own mouth though but another girl, someone she had never met before but would grow into a lasting friendship after this night. ”who screamed?”, he asked and penny waited a moment, letting her younger version investigate the surrounding area before hearing the scream again and taking off in the direction to where it was coming from. the question was repeated, ”emilee….a good friend.”. watching everything unfold as she pulled the young boy off her old friend, her fist colliding with his nose, ”so you were a witness to an attempted assault..”, but she shook her head, ”i was a witness to an assault. he got her…i was not fast enough to help.”.then, a hand wrapped around her mouth. it made her physical form jump, ”who grabbed you?”, the voice coming out of no where as she witnessed her sixteen year old self fighting off a young boy, ”the gang…or the young brother and a few of his friends ..”, and that was because the next thing heard besides a voice telling her that she was next was the sound of someone yelling ‘police’ and footsteps retreating as she was pushed to the ground. ”who was it that saved you?”, and penny felt a smile to come to her lips, even under the gravity of the situation, ”jason, my dad’s best friend..”. pulling her out of the trance for just a moment, he gave his patient water and a cookie to chew on which she did happily. relieved to be out of that trance, out of those memories, the look on the doctor’s face had her brows furrowing, ”we’re not done, are we?” and he shook his head, raising his fingers up as she took the last bite of the cookie and snapped his fingers, her head dropping once more. ”you’re next..”, he repeated close to her ear and penny, unconsciously, let out a scream. it’s power was intense, but the purpose was made, that night had a strong effect on her. ”come back penny, we’re going to the next time you meet those boys.”, she nodded, knowing it was out of her control anyway, ”how many times after that did you see them..”, and then she felt her mouth go dry. she instinctively reached for the water, pushing the liquid down her throat and then finally taking the last gulp, ”twice.”. being the social girl, she had never thought that they would have been in her school until she was pulled into the classroom with emilee. she remembered how quiet it was around the door and then remembered the school assembly that they were supposed to be going to. ”okay you were pulled into a classroom. did they tell you why?”, and penny shook her head, ”i think i was meant to watch…cause they got her again. apparently, they were not done with her..”, but the memory was painful, so much so that her voice was nearly gone as she gave her head a frantic shake and the doctor let it go, just this once but he did ask the question, ”did they get her again?’, and much to his and her relief, she shook her head no. ”what happened after that..?”, he asked, writing down more notes about her reactions. her voice was changing, she seemed more distant from this particular memory, ”she died.”, june 5th, that was what it must have been. only a couple months after the entire ordeal. she did not seem to have much to say about this memory, ”were you sad?”, he asked pen poised over the paper, ready to write down her response but all he got was a head nod and a tear rolling down her cheek, one she did not wipe away. it seemed that the girl had cried quite a bit over this loss, and the doctor decided to grant her mercy for the second time. now it was a different kind of emotion fell over the girl, she was no longer quiet but was just repeating the words ‘you’re next’. ”where are you now?”, her mind taking control of the trance to pull her into the worst night of her life,”parking lot. stayed after for a cheer thing…practice…emma needed another girl so i took the position. not like i could do much but i was light and small and they could toss me into the air…. she watched her small, ten year younger self stroll across the smaller parking lot. three figures appeared around the lone car, the smart thing would have been to turn around and she even began to shout that, ”what is happening penny?”, and the girl watched as she had been fishing for her keys, one of the few times that she had actual driven a car. ”penny.”, spoke the voice, demanding to know what was going on in the memory, ”they were waiting by the car. my dad got me a car, made me learn how to drive…taught me actually, his badge got me to skip the line…he abused his powers sometimes..”, giving a light chuckle but her eyes widened as she watched her self walk straight into the arms of a young eighteen year old nathan. ”nathan?”, he asked, expecting an answer, ”nathan, the school…burn out, the jerk who took my friend unwillingly, the one who tried to get me..”, tried being the operative word. she winced when she watched herself being tossed into the hold of another, arms caging her in while nathan removed his jacket. she could hear her own voice stuttering before she was told to shut up but instead of doing that she screamed. ”did anyone come?””, she shook her head no, ”not yet anyway.”, but someone would come, someone that was concerned for his daughter’s well being, ”who were these three guys.”, trying to bring her out of the forced memory, at least a little, ”that night my dad went out, he shot someone, someone who was waving a weapon and never put it down. nathan was his younger brother.”, a nod to be had as she witnessed in almost slow motion the events of one of the worst nights of her life. ”what happening?”, and she sighed, knowing it was futile to fight the memory, ”something was in my mouth, think a handkerchief, i couldn’t scream. my throat was burning from the built up screams ….and no one else was allowed to touch me, only him. he wanted revenge ..himself, by his own hand. i stopped him once with em…guess it bugged him but he found out who i was…whose daughter i was..”. she watched as her clothes were torn at, the knife to her neck, and how it travelled down, slicing away the fabric of her uniform. ”he got far, but not all the way, right?”, a nod, ”almost. he spent a lot of time threatening…and kissing..and licking, don’t understand the licking, really..”, trying to put a little bit of a lighter tone into the horror story, ”but he was shot before anything happened.” and then the truth came out when asked who, who shot him, who ended the boy’s life, ”my dad.”. ”happier time. tell me about grett..”, and a smile instantly broke out on her face which contrasted to the tears that were stained on her cheeks. she could not help but smile when she thought about her fiancé, even looking down to the ring on her finger. she wondered what he was doing right now and her mind had yet to conjure up some kind of memory, so many to choose from in the six years that they had known each other. they were both playful and childish, very much open but very closed, the two of them meshed well together. ”he is my entire life now, he was then too. in college, in new york…”, which is where she went to escape the guilt that came with her father covering up a murder and then retiring from the force, giving up his dream because she had been so stupid as to walk alone when there was someone after her. ”em didn’t come with, she went to penn state so i got to see her a lot but i made a new friend, she was so random, always speaking her mind, feisty but sweet…we got along, and we both ended up here actually. she introduced me to grett…which is greyson and matt. he told me to call him either and they were both fitting for him, so grett came into existence and no one else calls him that…I hope..”, furrowing her brows to the thought. ”how did you two meet?”, and she gave a light chuckle again, her mood lifting far higher than it had been, enjoying herself once more instead of down and moody, ”he happened to be at the same party. some that evie dragged me too…i was..and still not a drinker…so i was just talking to some guy. he had drank, i could smell it. being the flirt that i am sometimes, i didn’t catch myself flirting but i guess he did. anyway, ran into a bit of a trouble..”, which would mean that the male could not take no for an answer, ”and grett saved me. he was..so awkward and charming, dashing and turned out to be a friend of gio. evie’s husband..”, her smile was still there. it had not left since she was able to openly speak about her relationship with grett, a man that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with after she got the affairs of her father in order of course. so this is the last question…you keep saying fiance. how did he propose and how did you say yes?”, her smile only grew. the doctor was relieved to see that she was in a far better mood, that her life seemed to have turned around. she could recite the words from the letter and did so as she saw it in her memory, with him standing before her. ”he was not good with words…still not, still awkward when he wants to be romantic but he’s perfect, that letter was perfect..”, finishing off the final words with a deep sigh. the girl was clearly in love, too far to turn back now and would never willingly do so, ”how did you say yes?”, he asked, as she remembered the candles, the flowers, the letter and then on the desk was a small set of sticky notes. the girl reached for one and wrote her answer onto it. she had a moment of thinking of where to stick it but in her playful nature, she moved closer and bent down to his level, sticking the glued back onto his forehead and waiting for him to read. after that, it was a sealed deal, ring and all, kissing and a surprisingly quiet night of just them celebrating their love for one another. they were never too open of a couple, and would tell their friends in the morning. and a snap of the fingers pulled her distant look forward, catching up with the present with a flash of memories before she nearly fell off the couch that she was sitting on, looking over to the doctor, she slowly rose from her seat and cleared her throat, reaching for her bag, ”thank you…i mean, some of those memories really suck but they needed to be remembered…thanks for not giving up on my stubborn butt.”, she gave a smile, something that was worn naturally these days, ”one last question.”, and since she had gone through so many, one more did not seem so painful, ”why come back? this place does not seem like it is filled with good memories..” which she nodded to, agreeing with and then giving a light shrug, ”guess it’s time to make happier ones then, don’t you think?”, reaching over, she shook his hand and then stepped out of the office. the second that she did, the girl wiped at her eyes to be sure she was not a complete wreck as she was meeting grett in less than ten minutes. BEHIND THE MASK ERIN | TWENTY-ONE | EASTERN | ALREADY HERE | SHIPPER  |
