BERNARD, samuel vance

SAMUEL V. BERNARD

22 | HETEROSEXUAL | PACSUN EMPLOYEE | VISITOR | MATT LANTER

THE INTERVIEW

HELLO. THANKS FOR COMING IN TODAY. SHALL WE START WITH YOUR NAME?

Sam smiles. “Sure, why not?” He gestures toward the seat opposite of the interviewer. “May I?” At her enthusiastic nod, he pulls the chair out and settles down in one smooth step. His mother wasn't sure what he’d need, so an awkwardly bulky manila folder rests in his lap. “I’m Sam Bernard. Samuel, officially… but that’s a little bit too colonial for me. And besides, I only ever hear it when I've run into trouble.”

THAT'S A NICE NAME. WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?

Sam knows as well as anyone his name is nothing special. There were four students named Sam in his Spanish 3-4 class during his junior year, boys and girls alike. He acknowledges his interviewers words with a slight nod. He hates the churning of his stomach. There is no need to be nervous. Nothing to be afraid of. He intakes a breath of air before answering the next question. “I’m an employee at the Pacsun in Portland,” he recites. “I’ve been there for about five months now. I work everything from the cashier to restocking the shelves. Not really sure if that counts as 'for a living,' but hey, it's the best I've got going for me at the moment.”

INTERESTING. WHAT DO YOU DO FOR FUN?

“Oh, man. Good question.” Sam thinks for a moment. “I’m always in the mood for new adventures and trying new things, so my interests are constantly changing. Eh. Well, shit. Lately I’ve been focusing on work and bettering my equestrian skills. I can’t honestly say dealing with rude customers for eight hours a day is a dream job, but my coworkers know how to keep the mood light. When no one is in the store, we’ll blast the music and have competitions to see who can tidy up their ‘section’ the fastest. Yeah, we’re kind of dorky.”

“It makes work bearable, I guess you could say. I tend to go straight from work to the stables or vice versa. My brother’s always giving me grief about this, but I board Captain—my stallion—at a local stable owned by the Remingtons. Maybe you know them. Anyway, I love my horse. He’s a bit of an ass at times, but I grew up with him, taught him everything he knows. I used to dream of racing him in big-name races like the Kentucky Dirby. Like that will ever happen. The big dummy is too stubborn to work up to a gallop some days. I especially like taking him on the various trails Brunswick has to offer. Riding is in my blood—my mom used to ride, too.

“If you knew me, you’d know that I love being around people. I don’t really care what I’m doing as long as there’s someone to talk to. Baseball games, bowling, walking in the park, or even picking up trash on the side of the road could be fine with me given someone’s there to keep a conversation. That’s part of the reason why I live with my parents. At least then there’s always someone to talk to in the house, whether it’s my mom or my dad. I’m not really one to play video games or anything like that. Don’t understand the appeal. At the end of the day, it just comes down to whatever I want to do. Or what other people have planned.” Sam shrugs.

WOULD YOU SAY THOSE ACTIVITIES REFLECT WHO YOU ARE?

Sam laughs. “Oh, God, I sure hope not.” He shakes his head. “I sound like a whiny, dependent loser who can’t get a job, living in my parent’s basement.” Sam crosses his ankles subconsciously. “The problem comes down to what modern society expects from young adults. They’re expected to go off to college, degree in something pointless like psychology, and hope to find a job in a recession amongst millions of other college grads that also majored in something pointless like English because they aspire to be writers.” Sam rolls his eyes. “Don’t get me wrong—that’s all hunky dory if that’s what they want to do with their lives, but that’s not me. At all.

“Maybe I’m as old-fashioned as my name suggests. Did you know children used to live on their parent’s farms for most of their lives? This was back in the colonial days, of course. I’m not saying I hoe the garden for my parents.” He laughs. “They don’t even have a garden. All I’m saying is my parents haven’t moved since coming to Portland, so I already have a room there. And it’s not like I’m a deadbeat son, either. I work. I pay for Captain’s boarding fees, feed, and any medical conditions. For the time being, living with my parents just makes sense, even if I get a bit of flak for it.” Ethan is notorious for teasing him for being a “momma’s boy.” People…

“I’m not too concerned with the image people have of me, but I am bothered by their judgments about my life choices. My mom tells me to take it as a compliment. To her, I’m important enough to fret over, but I’ll tell you one thing—I could never be the price of England. The idea of someone following me twenty-four seven is unsettling. I said I liked people, but I don’t like people that much. I honestly think my ‘go with the flow’ take on life comes off as laziness, I really do. I chose Pacsun instead of college because I wanted to make an income right away, and leaving Captain behind was really too much to ask. I’m not living on my own ‘cause of my parents but also because it’s financially illogical. Guess there’s nothing I can do. People are gonna think what they want.”

A COOL CAT LIKE YOU MUST HAVE A TON OF SUITORS FLOCKING TO YOU, HUH?

Sam considers this. Modesty mandates denying any egocentric questions as such, but he promised to be completely honest within this interview. He sucks in a breath and replies, “You can say that.” He peeks up at the interviewer, unaware he had looked down at his lap. “Working in retail, you meet a lot of people, a lot of girls. I think flirting runs in my blood because my parents are very bold, as are my brother and sister. I flirt. Sometimes I find someone I like enough to go on a date. There’s this one girl, though. She’s currently in Europe studying abroad, but… I don’t know. We agreed to date other people while we were away… I think about her a lot.”

COOL BEANS. THEY SAY YOUR FAMILY SHAPES WHO YOU ARE. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOURS?

“My family’s great,” Sam says. “I have a brother, a sister, a mom, and a dad. I think that’s the ideal amount per family. You can have a classic sedan with elbow room, just enough food without having a ton of leftovers, and typically you can get away with having at least two minutes in the bathroom. Maybe less depending on when the girls in the house are getting ready.”

“My mom’s name is Sherrie. She’s a quirky ‘housewife,’ and she’s probably the most inspiring woman I know. I’d say I take after my mom a lot. When we lived in Brunswick, my mom would take me with her when she took care of her horses. I can only remember two of the three she had while I was growing up. Both were geldings. One was a paint named Brody. The other was a quarter horse named Mercutio. Unfortunately, both battled some arthritis later on in their lives, and my mom felt obligated to put them out of their pain. After Mercutio, she just didn’t have the time to keep driving back and forth from Portland to the Remingtons because we had moved a year before Mercutio passed on.”

“My dad, on the other hand, had never been interested in the same horse stuff my mom and I loved. He was more interested in riding his bike. Technically, they both love riding things, but it’s very different. I never enjoyed riding my bike unless I had to ride it into town for some groceries when Ethan wasn’t around to do it. My dad’s a smart guy, always reading and checking up on the stocks. He’s the one who works in the house. For Apple, actually. Hence why I have an iPhone.” Sam digs it out, showing the interviewer.

“Then we have my siblings. They’re both older than me.” Sam takes out a photo of the entire family from his manila folder. “That’s Ethan.” He points at the tall, scrawny kid on the end of the group photo. “And that’s my sister.” He stashes the photo back into the folder again. “My brother and I butt heads a lot, but he’s cool. He’s a police officer in Brunswick, which is funny because he was a trouble maker in high school. As for my sister, she’s a wedding planner down there. She’s a bit of a control freak.”

“Oh, and there’s also Captain, but I already clued you in about him. He’s a thoroughbred. I haven’t measured him in a while, but I’d say he’s about… 5’ 6” hands? Something like that. He’s great. And yes, I do consider him to be family.”

AND YOUR LIFE? TELL ME ABOUT YOUR PAST. I'M EAGER TO HEAR.

“Well, okay, where should I start? I was born in Brunswick on February eleventh twenty-two years ago. I was four days overdue, if I can remember correctly. Not that I’d remember. My mom told me that once. My brother was five, and my sister was three. My parents had lived in a little house off of Main Street when I came home. We moved a couple times to accommodate growing children, but we never left Brunswick.

Like I said before, my mom raised me around horses. I loved them from the get-go, and I used to throw the biggest tantrums when she’d go to the barn without me because I was in school or something. Our relationship really benefited from our mutual interest. She taught me everything she could, and whatever I couldn’t learn from her, she paid for private lessons with someone at the barn. My parents have always supported my siblings and I with the utmost love. Growing up with my mom at home all the time, we got to experience a lot of opportunities.

I remember one time I had been at a fair, and they had an auction. It was very southern. This was in Kentucky. My mom bought me tickets to see the Kentucky Derby for my sweet sixteen. Well, while we were they, we saw this auction, and there was this beautiful brown colt there. Yep, it was Captain. My mom bid about fifteen thousand dollars for him, so it’s safe to assume I did not get a car for a long, long time. It took me until about a year ago to muster up the money to completely pay her off, but it was worth every penny.

When I was in high school, my parents decided that Brunswick wasn’t our place anymore. My dad got a new job in Portland, so we moved. My sister came with us initially, but my brother stayed behind to go to the academy. The police academy. Portland’s been great. I’m always driving back and forth to take care of Captain, but that doesn’t bother me. I work, bunk at my parent’s house, and take care of my horse. That’s a typical day for me! It’s a nice, easy, comfortable life that I don’t think I’ll be changing anytime soon.”

What about a secret? Everyone has a secret.

“That’s a bit personal, don’t you think?” Sam asks, suspicious. But he did agree to be 100% honest. Still, he hesitates, measuring what he should say. There’s one secret that has never left him alone. “I was sixteen when Mercutio went lame. And it’s my fault, I’m sure. I was out during a thunderstorm. There was lightning, too. My mom had errands to run, so I ran over to the stables to take Mercutio in before the storm. I thought I’d have time before the storm hit to take him for a little ride. I was wrong, and the thunder ended up spooking him. Mercutio bucked me off and took off into the woods. I caught him, thankfully. I brought him back, but he was favoring one side of his body over the other. He broke his hip, unlikely to make a full recovery. I think he fell in the mud that night. My mom was crushed and stopped riding after she euthanized him a year later. The meds for the pain were too costly.” Sam hangs his head. “I should have told her what happened. Maybe Mercutio would have lived longer. Maybe my mom would still be riding.” Sam shakes his head, defeated. But he must recompose himself. “I need to tell her,” he adds, “but I don’t know how.”

ALRIGHT. TIME'S ALMOST UP. TELL ME ABOUT YOUR DREAMS. QUICK!

“Quick? Okay. Ready? Be promoted to manager at Pacsun. That’d be pretty great. Or, uh, find a nice girl.” Samuel forces a laugh. Speaking about his secret has dampened his mood. "To be honest, I haven't really thought about the future. I should probably start caring, huh?"

AND THAT'S A WRAP. IT WAS NICE GETTING TO KNOW YOU.

“Hey, no problem,” Sam says, smiling slightly, forcing cheerfulness. It seems the manila folder had been mostly useless, after all. “Have a nice night,” he adds, back pedaling.

BEHIND THE MASK

CHAR | OLD ENOUGH | PACIFIC | YOU KNOW WHERE | TIFF, HARLS, ADRIAN, WHIT, KEITH, TASHA

Darsee and Samuel will be the cutest, most lovable, fluffy couple on Earth, Mercury, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Neptune, and any other plants I forgot.